"shower by mail"

my handsome mr. came inside from gathering the mail yesterday and had a large brown box in his hands.   my first assumption was that it was from his work, as his office is in our basement and he receives daily packages/shipments/misc stuff.

he proceeded to come closer to me, set it on the counter and say, "this is for you, from ....."  which was a distant family-friend from my childhood who lives in minnesota.   my heart skipped a little beat and i was eagerly excited to open this big brown box (who doesn't love receiving boxes in the mail with surprises?).

on the top of the tissue lay a yellow card with my name on it and as i proceeded to open it, i could feel this warm wave of emotions run through me and my eyes fill with tears.  i then opened the card and got no further than the right bottom of the inside card filled with a list of four very special women's names, and the flood gates opened.  so much so, i couldn't even finish reading their individual words to me as my eyes were pouring out liquid drops.  thick, cloudy, heavy drops.

"alan, these are ladies i didn't even invite to my upcoming shower, so they didn't even know our needs," i stated.   he listened as i explained who each of them were (him having only met one of them, my Godmother, who attended our wedding) as i reminisced about their imprints they made in my younger life years.

he then asked quietly, "how did they know we were even pregnant?"

yes, it's that social media we call, "facebook."  i am 'friends' with my Godfather who must have told his wife who told the rest of the ladies.

and then i started crying some more.

alan sat there and watched me, a small smile on his face and stated, "babe, you're okay, this is a generous gift from some special women in your life."  I smiled and said back, "i know babe, i know. i'm just overwhelmed with the generous hearts of four women who i haven't seen in years."

You see, these women gathered together and sent what they called a "shower by mail" filled with gifts for our two miracle twins.  Fun, bright, neutral colors and gifts of fuzzy blankets, soft crib sheets, squishy wrist rattles, cozy sleepers, sweet bath towels and much more.

but the thing that got me, was not even the generosity of the gifts they sent, but the reasons behind why they sent this package.

the love they are already sending towards our unborn children.
the love they are sending to a family (me & alan) they haven't made eye contact with in probably over ten years.
the time it took for them to shop, wrap, write and ship this package.

but most of all, the tugging that their hearts must have felt towards our little family that led them to do so, by an awesome God.

i think it may have taken me 30 minutes to open this box because i had to keep stopping to wipe away the tears that flowed from my face.

and i know it may have been slightly due to my hormonal and pregnant state.  but in all reality, i know genuinely, it was more from my heart's gratitude towards women who have such a special place in my memory and my heart from my childhood.   a place filled with a whole family where my mom and brother still walk this earth.  a place where i ran recklessly and carelessly through life, loving the days and hours we spent with them.   a place that can only bring a warm smile to my mind's eye and my soul's longing.

i am still in such awe at this blessing.  i am in awe because there is such a part of me that is struggling with how much God is blessing myself and this family. i am humbled because i know my sinful self does not deserve this magnitude of gifts.

...but...

i am learning to receive each one with an open heart and one filled with complete amazement.

and some laughter.

why laughter?

because when the tears flow, they flow freely and recklessly.  and my handsome mr. just smiles and puts his arms around me...
and giggles.

and yesterday, as i finished opening up the package with him and looked at even his face filled with disbelief and thankfulness, he smiled and said, "you aren't gonna make it through your shower ya know."  


"I know," I said.  "I'm doomed." 


his response,   "maybe you shouldn't wear any eye makeup."

Gosh I love him.

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